Letting Go of the Illusion of Control –
There are many things in life we can’t control, and we accept that. We can’t control the weather or the fact that time marches on. We can’t alter the fact that everything always changes, although many people spend a lot of time and energy trying to keep things the same.
We can’t control other people, but that doesn’t stop some of us from trying with tactic after tactic. Pleading, begging, arguing, explaining, deal making, threatening, and various other techniques can appear to work in the short term, but don’t celebrate too fast thinking you made somebody do something. They gave in to you because ultimately they wanted to, for all kinds of reasons of their own.
It’s been said before, and I’ll say it again: insanity is repeating the same behavior always expecting different results. Insanity can also be trying all kinds of ways to get another person to do what you want. If it appears they have given in and agreed to your way, you can end up living with the illusion of control. You may have worn them down and worn them out and even made them afraid, but if and when they gave in to you it was their choice, not yours.
We have no control over other people, places and things, no matter how much we think we do. Each person’s thoughts and feelings and actions and reactions are theirs alone to decide.
Ultimately the only one you have control over is yourself. You are in charge of your actions, reactions, choices, thoughts and feelings.
If your focus is constantly on what is going on somewhere else, and what others are doing or not doing, you are not paying enough attention to yourself. You deserve your own attention. You are worthy of letting your own thoughts and emotions be front and center in your life. Only from a secure place within yourself can you make the decisions and decide the actions and reactions that are best for you.
Letting go of the illusion of control can be hard if it has become a lifestyle, but it can be done. Changing yourself takes awareness, desire, patience and determination, but it’s really worth it in the end. There is a certain freedom and peace of mind that comes with relinquishing control over the uncontrollable. May you find that peace.